The answer to the question of how long to wait to have sex with someone has puzzled daters since time immemorial. After all, we are all familiar with the common concern that we may appear too “easy.” Some people think it's important to stick to the “three date rule” (that is, getting laid on date 3 or later). But is this so?
Content Are there any consequences if you sleep with someone “too early”? How long to wait to have sex with someone? Conclusion: How long to wait to have sex with someone
WomanEL shares her opinion 3 experts who dispelled popular myths and told you what to do when searching for your soul mate.
Are there any consequences for sleeping with someone “too early”?
The good news is that there are no consequences for sleeping with someone “too early.” Despite what you've been told, sex on the first or second date does not automatically make you a prostitute. After all, there are cases where that spark on the first or second date turned into something truly long-term.
“If you feel that you both have the desire and ability to have sex regardless of the phase or dynamics of the relationship, go for it ! Sexual health expert and head of communications at MysteryVibe Natasha Marie Narkevich spoke about this. “What starts as a passion can develop into a long-term committed relationship. Relationship dynamics always change, regardless of length of time or intention.”
But there is also a caveat. Dating coach Damona Hoffman says that once you've had sex, it can become harder to separate your thoughts from your physical urges. And this can interfere with getting to know a potential partner and getting to know him better as a person.
“You're robbing yourself of the discovery and magic of waiting to see if your passion for this person intensifies and if you have true compatibility in the long run,” she explained. On the other hand, you may also find that it is not suitable for you. And if that happens, you might be glad you haven't slept with him yet.”
Likewise, sex with someone new can bring up a variety of emotions that can cloud your judgment or make it difficult to explore a romantic relationship. That's why somatic sex educator and Foria Education Director Kiana Reeves recommends slowing down and making sure your heart, body, and soul are aligned first before sleeping with someone. It's important to go into any sexual experience with absolute confidence that it's what you want.
Having consent, clear communication, and set boundaries is all that matters, regardless of the number of dates.
How long should you wait to have sex with someone?
No two relationships are the same. Everyone's deadlines are different! It's important to know what you want and feel safe before you have sex with someone new. Most often, these two things are not formed in 1-2 dates; they take time. That's the beauty of the dating process! Getting to know someone before getting physically intimate will make the experience that much better.
“If you feel emotionally, physically, and mentally comfortable with the thought of sex with this new partner, I recommend starting by creating a safe environment in which you are excited to explore together,” says Reeves. This means that you should be open with each other about what you expect from sex and what you are comfortable with; Everyone’s consent is non-negotiable.”
Additionally, Hoffman also recommends taking an emotional inventory to determine if you're ready. This means you need to ask yourself whether you trust him enough to share intimate experiences with him, and whether you can openly discuss your likes and dislikes, as well as the possible consequences of sex (such as pregnancy and STIs). If you can answer these questions with a resounding “yes,” you may be ready to take the next step.
Conclusion: how long to wait to have sex with someone
There is no right or wrong answer to this question. All the experts unanimously agreed that dating is not black or white. Setting a rigid schedule that you have to follow just doesn't work. After all, sex isn't a one-size-fits-all solution, so Narkewicz says it's up to each individual to decide when to have sex.
While some people may feel more comfortable letting the relationship grow and get to know their partner more deeply, partner before engaging in intimacy, others may feel comfortable immediately immersing themselves in them. The decision should be based on how you feel, whether there is trust and communication.
Whether this is the first date, the third, the seventh or the hundredth is up to you. Ultimately, the decision to have sex with someone new should not be taken lightly. No matter what society, your friends or family says, you are the only one who can make this decision. Regardless of what these deadlines look like, potential partners should respect this decision. If they don't, that's a red flag! Remember: you have complete autonomy over your body, and only you know when the time is right.
Spring is a great time of year for outdoor dates. The following date ideas will help you get closer.