All teenagers crave independence, want more control over their lives and more say in what they can and cannot do. However, to become fully independent adults, they also need a range of life skills, as well as the help and support of their parents. How to teach a teenager to be independent?
ContentHow to teach a teenager to be independent: survey results How to teach a teenager to be independent: 4 life hacks Give them more responsibility Believe in them Don’t control too much Let them do everything their own way Clear signs that a teenager is looking for independence and independence
There are many techniques on the Internet, but WomanEL compiled for Here's a simple guide to help your kids spread their wings.
How to teach a teenager to be independent: survey results
A survey conducted by the University of Michigan found that 97% of parents say they help their teenagers become more independent. But at the same time, a quarter of respondents admit that they are the main barrier to independence for their teenager. Because they don’t spend time and effort on giving their teenager more responsibility.
During the survey, questions were asked to parents of teenagers aged 13-17 years. Here's what these people did to help children become more independent:
- Giving them more choices. 86% of parents say they allow their teens to make more choices in their lives, such as what they want to wear and eat and what they want to do in their free time.
- Force them to do everything on their own. 74% of parents say they try to get their teens to do things on their own, such as doing laundry, cooking, and taking care of their belongings.
- Nothing else gets done for them. 65% of parents say they have stopped doing some things for their teens that they could do themselves, such as driving them to school or running errands for them.
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How to teach a teenager to be independent: 4 life hacks
Encourage teens to solve problems on their own, Source: freepik.com
Give them more responsibility
Start by giving your teen responsibility and control, but start small. Let them decide when to do homework, how much money to spend, and where and when they will meet friends. Can they be trusted? Expand their circle of responsibility.
Believe in them
If teens believe they can do something, they are more likely to try new things and take risks. So don't give them too many instructions or too many worst-case scenarios. Instead, let them solve difficult problems and give them the opportunity to ask for help when they need it. This is important for developing independence and giving teens the opportunity to learn and grow from their experiences.
Don't control too much
< p>As tempting as it may be to take control when you see them struggling or doing something wrong, don't rush into it. Let them figure things out, which will increase their self-sufficiency and confidence.
Let them do it their way
You may want to show your child the best way to do things. But it is only when teenagers are allowed to make their own choices that they begin to trust their own judgment and develop their own sense of identity.
Clear signs that a teenager is looking for independence and independence
The desire to become independent and responsible for one's own life often leads to disagreements between teenagers and parents who want to ensure the safety of their children. This, in turn, can lead to arguments, disobedience, anger, frustration and even feelings of rejection on both sides.
Lorraine Candy, podcaster of Postcards from Midlife, says: “When your children reach adolescence, they begin the normal process of separating from you. It's hard to predict what this will look like. But the experts told me one thing when I was writing my book on parenting teenagers. Teenagers need some privacy to begin to separate from you and form their adult identity.
They need to do it alone and spend time away from their family to figure out how they feel about it. So, as painful as it may be, you have to give them that space – they are building their adult identity; this is difficult to do because their neurology is changing, so they need personal time to do this. They also need quiet time and time away from family, which calms them neurologically.”
Here are some of the classic scenarios of a teenager trying to gain independence:
- He disobeys more often than not. tells you no.
- He challenges his authority.
- He violates boundaries.
- He wants to spend more time alone.
- He does not allow his photos to be published on social networks.
- He claims that he no longer likes the things that he liked before.
- He does not want you to see/meet his friends .
Remember that this is an important developmental stage as teens try to figure out who they are and where they fit in the world. To do this, they need to have their own space and friends. Let them know that you will be there if they need you, but that you also respect their need for privacy.
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